The Ballad of Elian Gonzalez
(Sung to the tune of "The Ballad of Jed Clampett" from "The Beverly Hillbillies")


Down in Miami Beach, lived a bum named Laz
Collected welfare checks, and caught a little bazz
One morning while he was working a new con
Up turns a six-year-old named Elian

"Cuban, that is. Right-wing tea. Republican gold."

Well, the next thing you know, Laz's name is big as Bush
His kin folk say, "You gotta spin this laddie's tush!"
We'll thumb our nose at Castro, lead the right to victory
And they'll send us so much money, we can get a jalopy!'"

"Ford, that is...S.U.V.;Gas-guzzler!"

(uptempo ending)

So Elian Gonzalez is fought over by his kin
His relatives who used him as a football won't give in
The right wingers who all claim that they are pro-family
Are letting Cuban exiles write our foreign policy

"Money talks - Y'all kick back now!"



Copyright © 2000 by John C. Cross & Wm. K. Tong

Visit John's web site, "Campaign 2000" at http://pages.prodigy.net/johncross/campaign.htm

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